Comments on: Is Facebook Making You Feel Bad? http://toomuchonherplate.com/is-facebook-making-you-feel-bad/ Break Free From Emotional Eating | Stop Fighting with Food and Start Living Your Life Fri, 13 Jan 2012 14:11:28 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Matthew http://toomuchonherplate.com/is-facebook-making-you-feel-bad/comment-page-1/#comment-1429 Matthew Sun, 06 Feb 2011 10:38:14 +0000 http://toomuchonherplate.com/?p=2675#comment-1429 Melissa, you are spot on. Recent research from Stanford shows that Facebook is making us sad: http://www.slate.com/id/2282620/ Melissa, you are spot on. Recent research from Stanford shows that Facebook is making us sad: http://www.slate.com/id/2282620/

]]> By: Debbie http://toomuchonherplate.com/is-facebook-making-you-feel-bad/comment-page-1/#comment-1420 Debbie Thu, 03 Feb 2011 00:40:28 +0000 http://toomuchonherplate.com/?p=2675#comment-1420 I was a career woman for 16 yrs after college, but decided to be a stay at home mom when my son was born 2 years ago (I am now 40). I love Facebook in some ways as it keeps me connected to so many people that I may have already lost touch with. However, it can hurt as well when you notice that someone has probably hidden your profile (they never comment on your occasional post -but are always commenting on others), or just seeing pictures of people with their big groups of friends from a million years ago, etc. Or if you ever get defriended...that can be so very painful even at my age. It is almost worse than high school in a way now that I think about it! ha ha! I was a career woman for 16 yrs after college, but decided to be a stay at home mom when my son was born 2 years ago (I am now 40). I love Facebook in some ways as it keeps me connected to so many people that I may have already lost touch with.

However, it can hurt as well when you notice that someone has probably hidden your profile (they never comment on your occasional post -but are always commenting on others), or just seeing pictures of people with their big groups of friends from a million years ago, etc.

Or if you ever get defriended…that can be so very painful even at my age. It is almost worse than high school in a way now that I think about it! ha ha!

]]> By: Laura http://toomuchonherplate.com/is-facebook-making-you-feel-bad/comment-page-1/#comment-941 Laura Fri, 15 Oct 2010 17:48:07 +0000 http://toomuchonherplate.com/?p=2675#comment-941 Hardest for me - as a stay-home mom of 4 kids - are the posts from other moms about how "perfect" their lives, kids and husbands are. It's interesting that a group of moms who are gathered in person will not hesitate to expound on the difficulties of motherhood, and share ideas and support. But on facebook there is this strange facade people hide behind. Perhaps that's why it's called "FACE-book"... :) I sometimes end up feeling like a bad mom because my friend just posted "Sunny day, 5 gorgeous kids, doting husband... life doesn't get better than this!" In the meantime, my 5 month old is having her second full-on tantrum, there are piles of clutter in every single room and I'm still in my pjs at 11 a.m. It's easy to believe my friend is doing something right, and I just don't get it. Hardest for me – as a stay-home mom of 4 kids – are the posts from other moms about how “perfect” their lives, kids and husbands are. It’s interesting that a group of moms who are gathered in person will not hesitate to expound on the difficulties of motherhood, and share ideas and support. But on facebook there is this strange facade people hide behind. Perhaps that’s why it’s called “FACE-book”… :) I sometimes end up feeling like a bad mom because my friend just posted “Sunny day, 5 gorgeous kids, doting husband… life doesn’t get better than this!” In the meantime, my 5 month old is having her second full-on tantrum, there are piles of clutter in every single room and I’m still in my pjs at 11 a.m. It’s easy to believe my friend is doing something right, and I just don’t get it.

]]> By: Laura Mueller http://toomuchonherplate.com/is-facebook-making-you-feel-bad/comment-page-1/#comment-881 Laura Mueller Fri, 17 Sep 2010 23:29:03 +0000 http://toomuchonherplate.com/?p=2675#comment-881 I am feeling lonely when I see my two sisters on facebook chatting w/"100s" of Fb friends. They very rarely, in real life, talk with me, phone me or e-mail me. Each time I see they talk with many and not much with their own sister it is difficult for me. I am single and live alone so maybe this is especially hard for me. Thanks for reading. I am feeling lonely when I see my two sisters on facebook chatting w/”100s” of Fb friends. They very rarely, in real life, talk with me, phone me or e-mail me. Each time I see they talk with many and not much with their own sister it is difficult for me. I am single and live alone so maybe this is especially hard for me. Thanks for reading.

]]> By: Ann http://toomuchonherplate.com/is-facebook-making-you-feel-bad/comment-page-1/#comment-778 Ann Fri, 06 Aug 2010 23:38:50 +0000 http://toomuchonherplate.com/?p=2675#comment-778 I found myself on your site, I had googled "why does facebook make me feel bad", so, I think I'm in the right place. I am so sorry Martha. I had tears in my eyes immediately after you had written "my Mom and brother died", and it is not even that "time" of month for me! I know we can't bring them back, and I believe what Melissa says, that a place like facebook can be deceiving, and hurt us rather then help us. Facebook to me, is like walking up on a busy street corner and you see someone you haven't seen in ages standing there, and you exclaim "HI!!! How are you!!!" and that is as deep as you may get with the people that are there. You will be offended, if, say the person standing there is your sister, or your cousin and they don't even turn around to say "HI!" and how about if you say "HI!" to someone standing there and they don't even turn around and look at you!! Yikes!! We therefore feel worse then before we walked up in the first place. I hope you can go and find a person to talk with. Maybe going to church, a big one, that has a group your age in it. I am 50 and I've tried everything. It was church where I met lots of people, and was able to meet people. I went to a counselor to talk about things I felt uncomfortable to share with people, and I went to a grieving group to talk with other people about my loss, and they understood. I didn't talk about the same things with everyone. That would be like going to McDonalds to buy a car (!). Going to classes, especially exercise and yoga classes they are a great place to relax and find people who just like to be around others. Good luck in your journey. I am rooting for you, and you can get through this, it will be hard at first, but the next thing you know, you will be feeling less depression when you find the right place to take care of the right issues. Thanks for listening. I found myself on your site, I had googled “why does facebook make me feel bad”, so, I think I’m in the right place. I am so sorry Martha. I had tears in my eyes immediately after you had written “my Mom and brother died”, and it is not even that “time” of month for me! I know we can’t bring them back, and I believe what Melissa says, that a place like facebook can be deceiving, and hurt us rather then help us. Facebook to me, is like walking up on a busy street corner and you see someone you haven’t seen in ages standing there, and you exclaim “HI!!! How are you!!!” and that is as deep as you may get with the people that are there. You will be offended, if, say the person standing there is your sister, or your cousin and they don’t even turn around to say “HI!” and how about if you say “HI!” to someone standing there and they don’t even turn around and look at you!! Yikes!! We therefore feel worse then before we walked up in the first place. I hope you can go and find a person to talk with. Maybe going to church, a big one, that has a group your age in it. I am 50 and I’ve tried everything. It was church where I met lots of people, and was able to meet people. I went to a counselor to talk about things I felt uncomfortable to share with people, and I went to a grieving group to talk with other people about my loss, and they understood. I didn’t talk about the same things with everyone. That would be like going to McDonalds to buy a car (!). Going to classes, especially exercise and yoga classes they are a great place to relax and find people who just like to be around others. Good luck in your journey. I am rooting for you, and you can get through this, it will be hard at first, but the next thing you know, you will be feeling less depression when you find the right place to take care of the right issues. Thanks for listening.

]]> By: Melissa McCreery http://toomuchonherplate.com/is-facebook-making-you-feel-bad/comment-page-1/#comment-581 Melissa McCreery Tue, 11 May 2010 20:00:08 +0000 http://toomuchonherplate.com/?p=2675#comment-581 Martha-thanks for sharing so candidly--and I am very sorry to hear of your loss. I know that grief can feel like such a lonely road--at it can be a long winding one. I am glad to hear that you have found someone who can help you as you go through it. We all need outlets and places we can communicate and social media sites like Facebook don't fit the bill for all occasions. Sometimes nothing beats face-to-face contact. I hope that you are taking good care of yourself as you go through this tough time. Martha-thanks for sharing so candidly–and I am very sorry to hear of your loss. I know that grief can feel like such a lonely road–at it can be a long winding one. I am glad to hear that you have found someone who can help you as you go through it. We all need outlets and places we can communicate and social media sites like Facebook don’t fit the bill for all occasions. Sometimes nothing beats face-to-face contact. I hope that you are taking good care of yourself as you go through this tough time.

]]> By: Martha http://toomuchonherplate.com/is-facebook-making-you-feel-bad/comment-page-1/#comment-580 Martha Tue, 11 May 2010 17:49:42 +0000 http://toomuchonherplate.com/?p=2675#comment-580 Facebook can make me feel bad because I recently lost my mom and younger brother and I don't feel like I can express my grieving or sorrow. I don't feel like I can ask for support or help - and these people are supposed to be my friends. They know I just experienced a tremendous tragedy and yet most of them do not offer any type of support at all. Some of them offer words of encourgement of holidays. However, I need these words on an every day basis. I don't have many people I can talk to - fortunatley, I have a wonderful therapist who listens and talks to me once a week. He is the only reason I am surviving. It does hurt to know that my friends on Facebook are carrying on with thier lives and are living happily with their families. I no longer have a family and I am hurting a great deal. I don't feel like I can express that for fear of looking like a basket case or like I am not strong enough or something. So, yes, sometimes Facebook does make me feel bad. Facebook can make me feel bad because I recently lost my mom and younger brother and I don’t feel like I can express my grieving or sorrow. I don’t feel like I can ask for support or help – and these people are supposed to be my friends. They know I just experienced a tremendous tragedy and yet most of them do not offer any type of support at all. Some of them offer words of encourgement of holidays. However, I need these words on an every day basis. I don’t have many people I can talk to – fortunatley, I have a wonderful therapist who listens and talks to me once a week. He is the only reason I am surviving. It does hurt to know that my friends on Facebook are carrying on with thier lives and are living happily with their families. I no longer have a family and I am hurting a great deal. I don’t feel like I can express that for fear of looking like a basket case or like I am not strong enough or something. So, yes, sometimes Facebook does make me feel bad.

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