Never underestimate the power of your head game.
How many times have you been determined to make a change, known exactly what was required to make that change, maybe even plotted out how you were going to do those things, and it still didn’t happen?
Six months later, the scale showed the same number, your closets still weren’t organized, or you still hadn’t seen that increase in your income.
Odds are you were working against yourself – maybe even without ever lifting a finger.
I want you to try something. Take a piece of paper and give yourself three minutes. Think about a change that you would like to make in your life and about why you want this change and what will be involved in making it so. Think about why you’re currently in the situation you’re in and what it will take to get the results you want. Now, take the next three minutes to complete this sentence about yourself in as many ways as you can. Ready? Do it now:
“I am the woman who ____________________.” Remember, you are thinking about yourself, and the change you want to make. Just list everything that you come up with that has anything to do with this change you’d like to make.
Have you done it? (If not, you really want to do this part before you read any further.)
Now, I want you to get two different colored pens. With one color, mark, or circle every sentence that indicates some kind of limitation or lack or less-than-ideal aspect of you. For instance, “I am the woman who is always late” or “I am the woman who gets distracted” would fall in this category. Now, mark all the items that reflect strengths, effectiveness, potential, or success in a different color. “I am the woman who gets things done,” “I am the woman who cares about others,” or “I am the woman who can do this” would fall in this category.
How is your list looking to you?
All day long we walk around with a mental soundtrack. It’s the way that we speak to ourselves, the commentary that we insert throughout our actions. The way we think and talk to ourselves impacts our choices, our results, and our overall sense of confidence and motivation. You know that expression “mental toughness”? It starts with what we believe and what we focus on.
Imagine you are trying to climb a mountain. You are hot and sweaty and trembling with effort. Beside you is a companion who tells you, “You’ve got this. You can do this. You’ve done tougher stuff.
You are sooo close.” Now imagine the message is 180 degrees off: “You’ll never make it. You didn’t prepare for this. You always quit when you get tired and it’s only going to get harder. You look ridiculous. Watch out, you could fall.”
Which climbing companion would you rather have?
Back to your list: what is it telling you? Are you setting yourself up for success or mentally pushing yourself back down the hill?
Our beliefs and the things we focus on shape our outcomes. If we’re constantly telling ourselves we aren’t effective or we aren’t good enough or we don’t have time or we don’t deserve, then we’re never going to create big, fun, juicy, inspiring, happy, successful lives.
If you see a gap between where you are now and where you want to go with your health or your happiness or your life, the smartest place you can start is with what you believe and with what you inspire yourself with daily. It’s a major piece of the head game for success.
Don’t be too hard on yourself if your list was loaded in the opposite direction. It’s okay if you believe the things you wrote. What you don’t want to do is make a list of limits your primary focus.
Rewrite your list if you need to. Come up with ten statements that reflect your potential, your assets, your effectiveness, and the other great stuff that you bring to the game. It’s the first step to winning.