As I mentioned in my last blog post, I’m a huge believer in the power of small steps and gradual change. But sometimes, that is simply not enough. When you find yourself stuck and unable to break through, a quantum shift is often called for—a shift in your approach, your mindset, and in your lifestyle. Though difficult to envision when you are flying solo, these powerful shifts can be easier to create than you might imagine when you have the right kind of help.
Sometimes you need someone else to help you carve out an approach that pays off.
Here’s the truth. Some of you are reading my newsletter, listening to the audios I send out, and knocking your heads against the wall, hoping to get somewhere that is very, very important to you. You’ve invested so much energy and so much of yourself in making things work better. If it hasn’t happened yet, it’s likely that you need help making that quantum shift.
The thing about quantum shifts is that they are often impossible to see from inside your current life. Sometimes we are so familiar with how we do things that we can’t even identify that another way is possible. Even trickier—sometimes we “kind of” see another way, but, we have massive blind spots that make getting there very difficult.
How exactly can someone help you with that?
When you are seeking a quantum shift, it’s important to be picky about who helps you. A family member, partner, or close friend who is already sharing your life, is not likely to be the person who has the skill, perspective, and type of relationship with you to help you make a quantum shift. In these circumstances, I recommend a trained and certified life coach. A life coach is not just a kind person. She’s also not like your old PE teacher who stood on the sidelines yelling for you to work harder. If you’ve never worked with a life coach, you might find that the approach that coaching takes is actually the beginning of the shift you are seeking.
A coach actually partners with you to accomplish your goals, honor your priorities, and create your best life. She takes your journey seriously, and holds your goals as important and worthy of respect and helps you do the same—even in the midst of your busy life.
A coach sees beyond your frustration, your perfectionism, the “old ways” of doing things that haven’t worked. A coach helps you untangle mindsets that sabotage you or leave you feeling bad about yourself and step into ways of thinking that encourage, even unleash, success. Those niggling voices that tell you you don’t deserve what you are striving for, that you shouldn’t ask for so much, that you shouldn’t need help? That voice that whispers that you’ll always be fat or that success won’t last? A reputable coach will call out those inner critics and help you get clear of the messages that hold you back.
A coach expects that you will have bad days (or even weeks) but holds the confident belief that you can get through them and still be effective. The bad days aren’t something to blame yourself for and success is only real if it can actually happen in the midst of your actual life.
A coach or expert can see the “holes” or the missing pieces in your blueprint for success. She helps you learn to flex and stretch new muscles and create new habits that work for you and your life. She knows that working smarter pays off more than always working harder.
A coach is invested in honoring what you do well and helping you leverage it so that you can create more ease and comfort in your life. She knows that you probably aren’t looking to work hard so that you can create more hard work. A coach helps keep your compass pointed at thriving.
My challenge to you:
Make a decision based on what’s best for you—not based on limiting beliefs. If you are stuck and your mindset and approach are creating a vicious cycle, the idea of investing in a coach may stir up objections or negative reactions. The challenge is in what you can learn from that. Here’s what I want you to do right now. Take out a piece of paper and make two lists. On the first, write down everything you’d take on if you had your own personal coach in your corner, coaching phone calls scheduled weekly, and email support when you needed it. List everything that comes to mind. Everything—big—small–everything. What would it be like to make that list a reality? Let it soak in. Objections come later. Now, list all your objections to getting yourself a life coach tomorrow. Every. Single. One. Don’t leave any off the list. Here’s the tricky part. It can be a great decision to invest in a coach and it can be the right decision not to. Take your list of objections and mull it over today with the following question: are these objections important to honor or are they a part of the mindset that is keeping me stuck? What can you learn from this exercise to help you create a more effective path forward?
Take good care,
